Se Hace Camino Al Andar

I. AM. EXHAUSTED.

I went to a professional development workshop at The Carle this morning and it felt good to be among colleagues, even if I didn’t know them.  I go out pretty often without Alice but it’s usually to do the grocery shopping, so this felt different. I was doing something for me and I was gone for HOURS.  And it’s worth the exhaustion that I’m feeling now.

Tomorrow is another long day, with three licensing exams to take. Henry and Alice are dropping me off at the test site at 7:45 am and I’ll see them again at 3, perhaps. My husband is a champ. As exhausted as I am, I know that being with Alice all day is even more tiring, and to do it two days in a row… Sure, he’s her father but when I’m home with Alice, my focus is on Alice and various household chores that may or may not get done. Henry has to balance his work with giving Alice the attention she needs and that’s not easy.  But he knows that I need to do something for myself and pushes me to get out. (We give each other the space and “permission” to go out alone, to get some headspace and breathing room. Living in a one bedroom apartment has it’s challenges and personal space might be the biggest one of all.)

This week, the PD and the test are just one-time things but I’ll be starting a pre-natal yoga class on Sunday, which is a step towards taking better care of myself, as I was reminded by the Peggy O’Hara quote that I posted yesterday.   A few months ago, I made the decision that I needed to get back to my reading habit. I used to read voraciously, often balancing a few books at a time. Somewhere along the line, my reading dropped to nearly nothing owing to a short attention span and a lack of energy, not to mention plain old lack of time. Since then, my “Read” list on Goodreads has been growing longer and longer. Though reading is not “getting out,” it is still time that I am making for myself.  It all counts and it all helps.